hoping

hoping all went well with brother in laws bypass surgery today

whew long day stress relieved al ittle lol

long day emotionally and mentally as i went to the big c doc and thankfully got told it was lesser of two evils so to speak apparently some old scar tissue from an accident like 30 years ago is becoming an issue now go figure  only two ways to solve it is suck it up and eat the pain and let it heal on own hopefully or worst case is they have to go in and get it and remove it which means blood thinners for rest of days  and thats not me im not popping pills to survive so ill take the suck it up route  right now and just deal with the pain

perspective

wow just found out today that my brother in law need bypass surgery and sitting there thinking about that yea what im going trough is scarey but it isnt shit compared to what he is going through  so all spped to you herb keep that shit tight and real

medical update

just finished talking to doc a bit ago seems its not liver based is more so spleen based guess that what i get for not having it removed all those years ago lol

speedy recovery

hopes and wishes for a speedy recovery for my brother in law who suffered a heart attack today   he's one of the good guys

marathon bobs burger

settling back with coffee in hand trying to get insides settled watching a marathon bobs burger session on hulu  since gf is back to ignoring me

morning not too shabby

well well morning started off not too shabby i must say no blood loss or major pain even had the energy to put together youngest rugrats wrestling ring that as par for the course did not come with directions on how to do so lol  and any parent that has had to endure that 7th layer of hell knows of what i speak lol

sports fan and fantasy junkies

this site is awesome if you are a fantasy junkie of any sport or if stats just are your thing
http://www.pro-football-reference.com/    it also has links to all other major sports IE: hockey baseball etc.etc.

well stick the dang fork in

well my suspicions were pretty much answered today as another hospital trip after what could only be called an epic shot to my ribs and mid torso area with a aluminum bat lol  led to another poke at my body (actually pretty pictures lol ) and the issue is centered in or on or around my liver area and you don't get an oncology appt for the hell of it so apparently they seen something that stuck out to them  i could look at it and be totally clueless lol 
but never the less im going to remain upbeat about it no sense in being a d-bag lol  and im going to continue swinging like i always have its either homer or strike out  but i have good peeps around me so i should be pretty ok in the long run

conflicted xmas

well day started off crappy with pain in the groin area which is nothing new considering the things that could be wrong with me but of course the docs aren't finished using me as a pin cushion yet lol but now we add nausea and sharp pain in the lower rib area which totally enhances everything else but today of all days i had to as the English would say and "keep a stiff upper lip for the kids " as today is all about them and if it is my last xmas the rest of my morning was totally awesome as all i want for xmas is my kids happy and excited and i got my wish got the nominal "cheesy" gifts from the kids another coffee cup as if i needed to add to the collection and a couple of books even though im not a reader lol but they are cherished gifts none the less still a strange feeling hangs over me as i stated in previous posts that not being around certain people during the holidays for the first time in nearly 7 yrs is mind numbing and reflective causing to say the least ok gonna go vertical for a few to see if i can stem the tide so to speak a little

just thoughts

they say that ignorance is bliss but im quite sure if you are being ignored bliss wouldnt be the first word to come to mind

does absence make the heart grow fonder  if a person says they need "time to miss yo

is amazing

is amazing that some people on this planet are so clueless  as to point out personal issues on public forums where thier own children who already have deep rooted issues with them can msee them and then act shocked or surprised that said child took offense to statement because she herself can read right through the heaping pile of crap that was stated lol (and mind you the child is 12 and acts way more mature then the adult poster lol )

FEELS WEIRD

Feels weird to spend xmas alone for the first time in seven seasons  will most likely feels twice as weird on new years eve not a feeling that im accustomed to at all . Im sure i will feel all types of things in the coming week with as i stated being alone for the first time in seven seasons and with the impending cat scan or my kidneys and mid section and impending prostate examine which im sure any guy thats had it done will tell you enjoyable isnt a word that would be fitting to describe the event